We-he-hell, shit on me backwards and call me a neon banana! Welcome, perverts, pervettes and everything between and beyond whether anti- or pro-pronoun, to the Our Gloriously Random Universe Edition! As you may have (likely not cared to) guess, this will be another one of those non-genre-specific editions where I fuckin’ pontificate for way too fucking long in the intro, and then play a bunch of seemingly random shit with which you jive-ass honkies can only moderately vibe. To be perfectly frank, even though that’s not my fuckin’ name and never will be, these editions are some of my favorite to make because they represent my listening habits far more accurately than any of the ones with particular themes. Why?
Well, whereas many allow mood to determine the music they listen to, I more often let the music dictate my mood. There are plenty of times when I do the former, but I try hard to not let myself get stuck in any one emotion for too long. Maybe part of the reason is that I used to listen to this one playlist I made called Kill Yourself quite a lot as I was dealing with all sorts of crippling depression, trying to untie my mental knots and such. It got to the point where I just got tired of hearing the same fuckin’ songs over and over and goddamn over again. The same lessons were learned over and over, same insight gained and regained, and eventually I did indeed untie those knots. Once I did though, once I got to a point of far greater clarity, I was able to put much of the negativity aside in favor of my damn near ceaseless curiosity. That enabled me to branch out, to explore with a clearer perspective, unobstructed by the same old excruciatingly mundane fuckin’ depression that had been stifling me for so many years.
These seemingly random editions are obviously not random at all. There are many different genres, of course, but they’re all part of a path I chose for myself and any of you motherfuckers who’re awesome enough to join me on my little adventures here on this podcast. There is indeed method to my madness, which brings us to the name of this edition: Our Gloriously Random Universe. Randomness is something seldom found in human endeavors, yet it is most likely how our universe came into being, and how pretty much everything has happened since. At least, in my opinion.
Let’s put it this way: if this shit is somehow actually being consciously guided, watched over, or was simply just put into motion and left to fucking drift (which seems pretty unconscionable), then there’s a lot of extra fucking space out there for us to be thinking we’re somehow special. That, and considering our very existence is under constant threat from any number of celestial catastrophes due to our damn near total lack of preparation for such matters, not to mention our own fatally neglectful and destructive activities on this planet, the notion of purpose amidst such chaos seems quaint at best.
Conversely, we can create purpose for ourselves, despite any and all randomness. Don’t get me wrong, we definitely are special in that we’ve attained consciousness, indeed, but we shouldn’t be so blinded by that to the point where we ignore the boundless fucking mysteries about which we’ve barely even scratched the surface. We’re special in that we’ve established some sort of order in an otherwise utterly chaotic universe, and even though it’s all pitifully futile on a universal scale, it serves our civilization (such as it is) well to maintain the order (to varying degrees, anyway).
I also definitely think it’s a cop out to end all cop outs to discredit ourselves for the progress we’ve made, not to mention the astounding fucking leaps in technological development, and the immeasurable beauty within each and every one of our imaginations. I think that if there actually was/is a consciousness out there, they would applaud us for using our brains in such myriad ways, and not squander such unfathomable qualities as omnipotence, omniscience, omnipresence, etc. on silly little creatures like us satiating their ego with nauseatingly repetitive worship.
But hey, what the fuck do I know, right? Maybe I’m wrong and I’m gonna burn in hell for all eternity for daring to question anything. Ah well. At least I experienced true beauty during my life, and much like Sisyphus (minus the hubris, deceit and such), I can (and do) feel happiness despite the maddening absurdity of everyday life, especially in this country. In fact, I more often than not find ways to embrace absurdity, to learn and create from it, and that’s one of the reasons I continue to do this little fuckin’ podcast here.
Amusing, really. I’m happy because I was happy before, thus I know I’m capable of happiness, so struggles can come and go as they please in my knowledge that even the most seemingly interminable tediousness will indeed be temporary (even if I end up dead from or in the midst of one or several of them). I do what I can to navigate them efficiently, and since I nearly entirely doubt anyone will be subjected to a literally eternal struggle like damnation, like that under which Sisyphus suffered, I have no need whatsoever to concern myself.
*fucking sigh* I imagine all this has been a total mindfuck and a how-d’ya-do kiss goodnight on the pinkie toe, whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean, but my point is simply this: embrace the randomness of the universe. Embrace the randomness, acknowledging how magnificently precious each and every moment truly is. Embrace absurdity as part of life, society, whatever, and that will help you cope with any feelings of futility you may have now or sometime in the future. “One must imagine Sisyphus happy,” right? Embrace doubt, because therein lies your license to explore! Embrace curiosity, because we only have this one lifetime to learn as much as possible, and leave some sort of legacy for whomever actually remembers us after we’re gone. Shit, this is starting to sound like a suicide note. I promise, promise, promise it’s not. I’m actually being genuinely positive, and I hope at least one of you motherfuckers appreciates it.
Oh! Oh oh oh oh oh! It’s also Festivus today, and I have some serious fucking airing of grievances to do, but I’m gonna save that shit for New Year’s. Who knows, though? Maybe I’ll feel differently next week. Know what though? Know what I won’t feel differently about? Know what I will consistently fuckin’ feel ’til my last fuckin’ breath?